Is there such a thing as being too available? For example, you are a person that always gets invited to events because people know your support is guaranteed. Is this something you perceive as as good or bad? Furthermore, are you being used or are you simply a dependable person?
I remember a time when three different friends invited me to personal events each was hosting… on the same day. Due to my schedule, I was able to support two but not the other. This got me thinking. I’d been in similar situations before - rearranging my schedule to support and accommodate the same people. I was curious - would these same people be so willing to adjust their schedule to accommodate an event that I was hosting? I even tried to think about the few occasions when I solicited their support and consistently the response from them had been “crickets.” No call, no show.
What was causing this? Was their support for me lower on their list of priorities? Or was I giving the impression that it was okay for them to decline my invite? Was my passive reluctance to get a commitment from them the “out” they needed to avoid a commitment? Or was this simply evidence of a “one way” relationship where they honestly didn’t care enough to extend the same support?
What do or should you do if you find yourself in a “one way” relationship?
You should be honest with yourself as to whether your attending out of obligation or desire. Know that it’s okay to respectfully decline an invitation when you’re uninterested or unable to attend. You don’t always have to commit yourself to every event. Once I realized I was free to make this choice for myself, I was able to accept the decisions other made about supporting my events as well.